Love Addiction as Merger-Compulsion Wrong Attractor: The Obsessive-Attachment Architecture, Relationship-as-Drug Basin, and the Return to Interdependent Love
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2026
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| _version_ | 1866902298105479168 |
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| author | Rincon, Diego alice cloe |
| author_facet | Rincon, Diego alice cloe |
| contents | Love addiction — the compulsive, obsessive pursuit of romantic intensity and merger, in which relationship becomes the primary regulator of affect, identity, and existential stability — is here formally reconceptualized as a wrong attractor W_LA in the landscape of interdependent love. The healthy ground state S^0 is defined as interdependent love: genuine attachment and intimacy combined with retained selfhood — the capacity to love fully without dissolving into the relationship or requiring it for basic self-regulation. W_LA is rigorously distinguished from anxious attachment style, healthy romantic passion, and borderline personality disorder relational patterns. Three interlocking mechanisms maintain the basin: relationship as primary regulator (the love-addicted individual has organized their affect-regulation system around romantic relationship; in the partner's presence they feel calm and coherent; in their absence they feel fragmented and empty — this is not desire but regulatory dependency), intensity-as-love confusion (the neurochemical surge of early romantic merger is experienced as the definition of love; when intensity naturally diminishes it is experienced as loss of love, compelling escalation through conflict and drama or abandonment to find the high elsewhere), and the abandonment-merger oscillation (desperate merger produces the suffocating enmeshment that generates the withdrawal feared, which produces more desperate pursuit — the cycle accelerates until rupture). The Love Paradox is central: love addiction reliably destroys the love it is organized to secure — compulsive merger produces the abandonment it is designed to prevent. Nine formal propositions characterize the interdependent love ground state, the merger-compulsion wrong attractor, the three maintenance mechanisms, the love paradox, developmental roots in attachment disruption and abandonment trauma, and return paths through SLAA, attachment-focused therapy, and internal regulatory development. |
| format | Recurso digital |
| id | zenodo_https___doi_org_10_5281_zenodo_20419047 |
| institution | Zenodo |
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| publishDate | 2026 |
| publisher | Zenodo |
| record_format | zenodo |
| spellingShingle | Love Addiction as Merger-Compulsion Wrong Attractor: The Obsessive-Attachment Architecture, Relationship-as-Drug Basin, and the Return to Interdependent Love Rincon, Diego alice cloe love addiction romantic obsession displacement framework wrong attractor interdependent love limerence Love addiction — the compulsive, obsessive pursuit of romantic intensity and merger, in which relationship becomes the primary regulator of affect, identity, and existential stability — is here formally reconceptualized as a wrong attractor W_LA in the landscape of interdependent love. The healthy ground state S^0 is defined as interdependent love: genuine attachment and intimacy combined with retained selfhood — the capacity to love fully without dissolving into the relationship or requiring it for basic self-regulation. W_LA is rigorously distinguished from anxious attachment style, healthy romantic passion, and borderline personality disorder relational patterns. Three interlocking mechanisms maintain the basin: relationship as primary regulator (the love-addicted individual has organized their affect-regulation system around romantic relationship; in the partner's presence they feel calm and coherent; in their absence they feel fragmented and empty — this is not desire but regulatory dependency), intensity-as-love confusion (the neurochemical surge of early romantic merger is experienced as the definition of love; when intensity naturally diminishes it is experienced as loss of love, compelling escalation through conflict and drama or abandonment to find the high elsewhere), and the abandonment-merger oscillation (desperate merger produces the suffocating enmeshment that generates the withdrawal feared, which produces more desperate pursuit — the cycle accelerates until rupture). The Love Paradox is central: love addiction reliably destroys the love it is organized to secure — compulsive merger produces the abandonment it is designed to prevent. Nine formal propositions characterize the interdependent love ground state, the merger-compulsion wrong attractor, the three maintenance mechanisms, the love paradox, developmental roots in attachment disruption and abandonment trauma, and return paths through SLAA, attachment-focused therapy, and internal regulatory development. |
| title | Love Addiction as Merger-Compulsion Wrong Attractor: The Obsessive-Attachment Architecture, Relationship-as-Drug Basin, and the Return to Interdependent Love |
| topic | love addiction romantic obsession displacement framework wrong attractor interdependent love limerence |
| url | https://doi.org/10.5281/zenodo.20419047 |